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RussTCB
 Rep: 633 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

RussTCB wrote:

removed

Axlin16
 Rep: 768 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

Axlin16 wrote:

Completely agree with the diversity of this board and what you can express here and people actually care and listen.

Heartfelt love goes out to both Buzz & Russ, and the few others i'm thinking of right now that have shared their family stories on here of loss. Thanks for sharing.

I think what bothers me in my life, is my family is kinda like the old Guns N' Roses. We're all alive, and there's so much bullshit drama that goes on that nobody wants to have anything to do with each other, which is kinda tougher in some ways. It's like you scream at the top of your lungs, "it can be different! It doesn't have to be like this! We can all be a family, all love each other, all have each other in our lives, without using each other and manipulation, and all that drama"

But there's so many selfish people involved, that it's just... never ever gonna happen. I gave up hope years ago. I spent literally a decade away from my grandparents (which I always around in my childhood), and came back ten years later basically to spend time with and help the family with my dying grandfather who died in February last year.

Pretty much the only time we spend with each other is "act of God", which is absolute peril or death. And that alone is just.... unnecessary. I love them all, cousins included, and if they'd JUST GIVE 10% love in return, i'd give them 100% back.

They won't even give 10%. It's all about them. There's nothing I can do.


Anyways, thanks for sharing guys. Much love.

buzzsaw
 Rep: 426 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

buzzsaw wrote:
Axlin12 wrote:

Completely agree with the diversity of this board and what you can express here and people actually care and listen.

Heartfelt love goes out to both Buzz & Russ, and the few others i'm thinking of right now that have shared their family stories on here of loss. Thanks for sharing.

I think what bothers me in my life, is my family is kinda like the old Guns N' Roses. We're all alive, and there's so much bullshit drama that goes on that nobody wants to have anything to do with each other, which is kinda tougher in some ways. It's like you scream at the top of your lungs, "it can be different! It doesn't have to be like this! We can all be a family, all love each other, all have each other in our lives, without using each other and manipulation, and all that drama"

But there's so many selfish people involved, that it's just... never ever gonna happen. I gave up hope years ago. I spent literally a decade away from my grandparents (which I always around in my childhood), and came back ten years later basically to spend time with and help the family with my dying grandfather who died in February last year.

Pretty much the only time we spend with each other is "act of God", which is absolute peril or death. And that alone is just.... unnecessary. I love them all, cousins included, and if they'd JUST GIVE 10% love in return, i'd give them 100% back.

They won't even give 10%. It's all about them. There's nothing I can do.


Anyways, thanks for sharing guys. Much love.

I can relate to the family drama part.  I'm not sure my mom's family knows she died because nobody has spoken to them in about 20 years...not exaggerating.  It's unbelieveable what some families go through and makes me feel blessed that my immediate family is all very close and we all get along well.  I am seeing them in June and we are going on our 3rd cruise together as a family (minus my mom of course) since my mom passed.

Axlin16
 Rep: 768 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

Axlin16 wrote:

Yeah. I'm in a similar situation. I could die, my parents too, and we'd rot for months before anyone knew.


Another issue with my family, and I don't know about yours, but like with the GN'R reference, we have certain people in the family (like ID's) that will just make up lies out of thin air, which are total reversals of what THEY did, to try to discredit someone from dealing with their bullshit publicly.

And then these lies are perpetrated for years and years, that the truth is lost in translation years later. But the resentment stays just as real.


It is the most complicated, hard to deal with issue i've ever had to deal with, and i've learned tons of lessons from it. You cannot deal with poorly educated, egotistical, illogical liars, who anytime you get somewhere to some sort of equal ground, they completely RESET everything every ounce of work you put into it emotionally, because they compound another lie or use a manipulation tool to try to get something for themselves.


Sound familiar?

Anyways, it's beyond difficult, but i'm over it now. I let go of the anger long ago.

Rex
 Rep: 50 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

Rex wrote:

Man, I can't imagine what you guys have gone through losing your mothers.  I don't know what I'd do, but it comes to mind sometimes and it fucks me up.

On a shitty note, I found out a very dear friend to me has some kind of bone cancer and has been given 6 months to live.  She is like a grandmother to me and I am having a hard time coming to grips with this.  She is a fighter though, and if anyone can get through this, it's her.  Although this sucks for me, I'm even more worried about her son.  She's all he's got and I can't imagine what he's going through.  I'm keepin my chin up, for both of em.

RussTCB
 Rep: 633 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

RussTCB wrote:

removed

Axlin16
 Rep: 768 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

Axlin16 wrote:

Yeah best wishes Rex with your friend. What you don't want to do is run off because you can't deal with it. Man I see that all the time with people who get sick, and it's the absolute worst for all involved. It ruins memories, relationships, and it hurts the person at a time that they are most vunerable.

Rex
 Rep: 50 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

Rex wrote:

Thanks guys.  It's fuckin tough, but I will be there.  No doubt about that.

monkeychow
 Rep: 634 

Re: Mother's Day Blues

monkeychow wrote:

Thinking of all you guys.

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